would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
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