Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
