drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
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