I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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