she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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