Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
