brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
