You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
