I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
