question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
