Well douche your snatch and let's go!
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
This house was built for laser tag.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize
