just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
