Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
