farters have to be the big spoon...
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
