We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
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