He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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