who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
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