You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
