were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Never underestimate the power of titties
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
