I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
