Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(562): View more from California

Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.

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(312): View more from Illinois

Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.

(773): View more from Illinois

...well that sucks.

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(352): View more from Florida

Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?

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(224): View more from Illinois

he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.

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(845): View more from New York

I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting

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(847): View more from Illinois

Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?

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(870): View more from Arkansas

Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.

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