I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
