ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
