"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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