Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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