she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize