Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
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