Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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