end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
