Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
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