I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
jump out the window naked night went bad
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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