..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize
