Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
