Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
