dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize