Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
time to smoke my breakfast
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
this will be a night to untag.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
