Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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