That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
