chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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