you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i already hear my dad disowning me
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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