kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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