I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
