Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
