it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
