apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
