David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize