How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
You took a bar mat shot.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
