i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
