theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
