i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
