Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
