I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Randomize